Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Robin


Have I mentioned that my local
supermarket is owned by a drug cartel
and that the market is a money laundering front?

Well, it is.

Thank god for them.
Cheap groceries are really hard to come.

You can get boxes of cookies for half of
what you would pay for them in
lawful establishments,
Ditto for delicious fruits and veggies.

Let's support our local drug cartels!
Modern Day Robin Hoods.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Where Eagles Dare


We walk the streets at night-
We go where eagles dare
they pick up every movement they / pick up every loser
with jaded eyes and features you think they really care!
I ain't no goddamn son of a bitch / you better think about it baby!
I ain't no goddamn son of a bitch / you better think about it baby babe.....

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Catholics



Mexicans are Catholic.
(we have the Spaniards to thank for this)

Catholics are guilty and have an inferiority complex
therefore
Mexican are guilt ridden and have an inferiority complex.

Hundreds of years of Catholicism leads to signs like these.
it reads
"For suggestions or complaints"

Gabriel A.


Gabriel Alejandro Farfan is all of 24-
24 going on 18.
To say he's a little green is putting it mildly.

In 5 short weeks he'll be Japan
doing God-knows-what with God-knows-who

He's a sweet kid with no ill intentions,
he's the perfect pray for pickpockets, the Yakuza,
petty thieves, common bad guys/ et all

I hope he makes it past the airport
I really, really do

I love him dearly

Friday, July 18, 2008

American Dreams


Luis Zapata loves candy- this is a fact.
Francisco Javier Arredondo loves all things sweet.
I vividly remember them downing 2 liter bottles of Coca-Cola with 3 large swigs.
They'd drink that and a 6-pack of Bud and work on their cars.

Their brother Lupito was a real gent and not as brutish-
he bought me my 1st favorite shirt-
(it was a green camouflage shirt with Sgt. Slaughter screened on the front).
and used to take care of me from time to time.

It's a miracle they're still alive- they've all lived incredible harsh lives.
If I got into in detail it'd be a VERY long post- and I'd probably end up crying.

I've not seem them in a decade and a half.
I miss them.

Robot


I love my friends.
They're the only ones more degenerate then I.
I mean that in the best, most endearing way possible.
They are completely irrational but are so set in their
convictions and beliefs that, after a while,
they (inexplicably) start making sense.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

The onset of Adulthood



It hits some of us harder than others.
Some don't even realize they're knee deep already.
And others......
others never fully come into it.

A select few skip it altogether.

We have been let down before



I don't understand people that get overtly into friendly (i.e. non-professional) competitions.
Relax dudes! Take a chill-pill. It's not like we lost the championship of champions of the universe.

We totally got our asses kicked this last Saturday... the AdiCup was an AdiDisaster.
I had fun though.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Don't tread on me, I have the ability to inflict Pain


Dear NPR,
I like you, I really do. Most of the time you are right on the money with your views and commentary. Your shows are good and they make my drives way smoother than what they would be if you weren't there.
However, You REALLY have to stop it with this "Latino" Vote specials that you keep doing.

Calling a Hispanic person Latino is like calling a Black person Colored, or an Asian person Oriental...
(they're not fucking rugs are they- they are people! thus, I'm not a fucking bad bar night somewhere or a type of Jazz!!!!!)
We're Hispanic not Latino- live it- love it, get used to it.

If you keep pissing us off we'll vote for this guy
who, really, should have been the President of this country long ago.

sincerely,
Luis Felipe Farfan-Arredondo

WOW!


The good people at JPG Mag. have decided to publish one of the photos from this here blog. Thanks for that guys, and extra thanks for the check!
Look for it in newsstands in the coming weeks, issue 17.....

In other news- I will either be super stoked or super bummed this Saturday night. My football squad "All Faith F.C." will be participating in the 3rd annual AdiCup, sponsored by Adidas. If we win, drinks are on me...

Lastly the weird people at Harper Collins hit me up about doing a diet book for them. Serious.
I told them I needed 100K, up front in cash, all 100's... and complete creative freedom AND I choose the editor for the book.

I'm waiting to hear back but honestly, with demands like that I'll be very surprised if they say yes-
If they do, however, look for me at the Bellagio Casino in Las Vegas. I'll be at the roulette table.
(too bad there's no Russian Roulette there).

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Independent




Independence day in America means preparing meat in BBQ grills AND using ancient Chinese pyrotechnical procedures to create multicolor explosives for entertainment purposes.
Go America!

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Into the Fire


Indeed we are in the midst of the strangest, most fucked up times in modern history.
Disturbing was the fact that scientist recently announced that in the next few years the Southern California area will experience an increase in temperature between 5-10 degrees.

It's already over 110 Fahrenheit in some places.
People weren't meant to live in 120 degree weather, only cactus was.

Actually, I've never even wanted to live here-
I'm obliged to live in this hell because I have chosen to be a good son to my wonderful parents.

I hope that science will scare them back to our home in Aguascalientes, Mexico.
If they do move- I'm immediately moving to any Nordic country.